How to Be Kind to Yourself (and Your Home) as You Declutter

decluttering May 25, 2024
decluttered baskets on a shelf


Approaching decluttering from a place of non-judgment, self-love, and acceptance will positively influence the process and the end results.
If you are clearing clutter to bring more love and joy into your home and life, then it makes sense to be loving and joyful as you declutter. Loving yourself (and your home) as you declutter is a very different experience than judging yourself as you clear clutter. It's common to feel guilty about money wasted, shameful for the mess and disorganization, or condemn yourself for mistakes, but all of this negative self-talk will only fill your home (and your life) with those energies. ⠀

While the decluttering process can elicit feelings of shame, guilt, regret, or frustration, we can shift away from these judgments and into a place of self compassion by beginning the process with the question, which part of my home needs more love? This simple question will set the intention for decluttering with love and kindness and has a very different energy than starting by asking which part of my own is a mess or most cluttered. Our homes, like us, are whole and worthy. There is nothing that needs to be fixed— only revealed.
If you aren’t sure which parts of your home needs more love, consider the areas of your home that you least like or often avoid. By turning your attention to these areas you will bring them to light. As you declutter you will shift the energy in these spaces and in the part of your life that they reflect. As Dr. Ron and Mary Hulnick @universityofsantamonica say, “healing is the application of loving to what hurts.”
If you find yourself judging as you declutter or engaging in negative self-talk (and we all do!) follow these steps:

  1. Notice yourself judging by saying to yourself, "oh, there I am judging..."
  2. Forgive yourself for the judgment, "I forgive myself for judging myself as i.e. messy, wasteful, disorganized..."
  3. Take a deep breath. Choose a new thought such as, "while many of these things no longer reflect who I am, at one point they brought me joy and for that I am grateful..."
  4. Affirm your intentions, "I am excited to see how much more joyful my life will be as I align my home with my current desires."
  5. Return to your clearing.

The energy we bring to the process of clearing clutter and caring for our homes will influence the end results. When we come from a place of curiosity, lightheartedness, and acceptance, as opposed to overwhelm, judgment, or resistance we will create more love and joy in our homes, ourselves, and our lives.

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